Brotherhood 2.0: February 6th
In which Hank apologizes for the chin waxing and discusses babies.
Note: The broken archive links have been fixed, so now you can go back and watch previous episodes much more easily. Sorry about that...
posted by John Green @ Tuesday, February 06, 2007
35 Comments
35 Comments:
That.
Is one.
Creepy.
Ass.
Doll.
Thanks for the nightmare.
Yikes, Hank. Never shake a baby!
Hey now. John likes to think about babies in very abstract terms, not realistic ones. My theory is that he likes to talk about babies because he knows HE CAN'T HAVE ONE ANYTIME SOON. Primarily because his wife has other stuff she needs to do first.
Don't encourage him, Hank. I'm serious.
Sincerely,
yeti
A word of advice for Sarah and John.
Babies are wonderful. Oh yes they are. I'm speaking from experience. However, my wife and I were married for 6 years before we had Jack.
So my advice? Take your time. Enjoy being a couple. Seriously. There's no rush. No matter what grandparents might say. :)
Yes, I'm with Peter (and Sarah). It is best to wait a while.
But I sure do like babies.
Dear Yeti and Katherine (along with Hank and John),
I just want to go on record that I will always be bothering the boys about something....a grandchild will not change that...so there is no need to rush into parenting. Although, the Green DNA is something...John ripping off his skin and Hank talking with a girl version of Chuckie. Why wouldn't you want to see that reproduced?
Love,
The Mother
I sure do like babies, too.
Luckily Wedgie generously shares hers with me, so I don't have to have one of my own.
Oh. My. Gosh.
I love your mom.
Kelly --
That's what I need. I don't need a baby. I need a FRIEND with a baby. My editor, Julie, has a baby--but he lives like 60 miles away and I don't have a car. We need a closer baby!
I love that all the Greens are commenting on this. Babies do that to a family; suddenly everyone has something to say. If only 'Awww, aren't you the cutest? Yes you are! Yes you are!'
The Yeti seems uber-awesome! High Five!
39.91 miles
We deliver.
Friends with babies are great. It's strange, because Wedgie and I have been friends since we were about 12, and now there's a little person that was obviously made by her... It's pretty neat.
Also, I love your mom, too.
Sorry, John. I want to be your friend, but that's a lot to ask.
You know John, there are plenty of babies at the park. Nice rich babies. What fun! Just make sure that the nanny is alright with that..
This might age me but...I had a doll just like that as a kid. Hank, you need lessons in doll-talk. She's saying "I'm stupie".
Here in California, the legal age for marriage is 28 for girls and 30 for boys. For procreation it is 32 for girls and 35 for boys. At least thats what my boys think.
Hey John... maybe you could friend one of the nannies and end up with a rich kid baby (friend) and and possible even a funny dog both at the same time.
Babies are cool... mine is seven now, and the fun just keeps coming.
I agree with Peter, in that you should wait. Wait and get as much sleep as possible cause once your little Green gets here you will never sleep again. John, please do not play Hanks game "hide the baby from mommy" once little Green is here. There are not enough words to even begin to describe the feelings that run through you when you look at your child. It simply rocks!
I couldn't stop laughing after that virginity bit.
But that is def. one scary doll. Where in the world did you find it?
That post from Mom was priceless. It suddenly becomes clear where the Green boys get their sense of humor!
Your mom is hilarious...at least we know you and Hank come by it honestly!
My husband and I are going to have to enter therapy after watching THAT.
Our baby (now 22) had a doll just like that when she was 2. Once upon a time, baby and Dad had to take snowy drive from Cape Cod to Deerfield, MA in the middle of the night. The alternator went on the fritz and, while Dad hunkered down watching the lights slowly dim as he prayed to the car gods to Make It Home, baby slept conveniently in the back. Concentrating on the miles ahead of him, Dad was totally tuned in on Getting Home. Baby quietly woke, grabbed her little dolly, and pulled the string.
Dolly spoke in her creepy Chuckie dialect.
Dad screamed.
Baby screamed.
Dad subtracted two years from his life expectancy.
*********
Just now I called him over to checked out 2.0 and I got to hear that scream again.
Subtract another year.
i hate to argue about this, but i think that creepy baby was saying, "i'm sleepy."
What astonishes me is that no one is commenting on the fact that John called Hank after he lost his virginity.
As John's writing partner, I told him my own story of the great event. (Something else we do besides thinking up "in your pants" titles and having meltdowns.)
I made no such phone call after my Great Awakening. It was much more romantic. After the main attraction, my then-boyfriend burst into tears and crawled off to watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. He sobbed for some time. I took a Tylenol and went home to complain to my best friend.
Normally, I would not be so forthcoming with personal information, but John told me that if I told this story in the comments, he would buy me a cup of tea. I'll do pretty much anything for a hot drink.
Mary Fran - yeah, I agree. Also, it's not "Potty Cake." It's "Patty Cake." At least when I play it. And I do still play it.
Maureen - HAHAHAHAHA!
That is a Talking Baby Beans and she is not creepy.
And she's probably worth at least 4.99 on eBay.
OK, well, I guess it's good that Katherine's brother made me an uncle early because I see I'm not getting any nieces or nephews out of you people for quite a while.
I also agree that kids should come late.
Baby Shingy isn't all that creepy unless she's talking. She was Katherine's toy when she was a baby (early 80's) and was still hanging around for Katherine's Brother's baby to play with upon visiting. Her voice has deteriorated fairly severely and in waiting for her to say "Chicken Poo Ha Ha Ha" I actually was afraid I'd break her string.
What she's actually saying is "Play Patty Cake" "I'm Sleepy" and "Peekaboo Hahaha." Though, honestly, I hear "Stinky" and "ChickenPoo" every time. She says a bunch of other creepy stuff too.
Thanks to all the Moms and Dads (especially my mom) for all the baby related comments. I've been thinking a lot about babies lately...and how I don't want one, and whether I should.
I think it's apparent to anyone who is clued into Brotherhood 2.0 that, yes, indeed, one day the Green brothers need to pass on those genes. Two incredibly talented, smart and funny guys.
You guys rock. Keep being you.
Hahahaha,
The yeti put the smack down on Hank!
I, myself, thought the lost virginity comment was a wee bit harsh.
Here's why babies are most awesome: while sitting on my lap and watching this week's videos, my 8-month-old very excitedly clapped his hands at John howling in pain during the chin waxing part and then during the creepy doll bits. Babies just instinctively get The Funny.
First of all- love the virginity comment. I think I might have snorted (in a totally ladylike way) when I heard that.
And... well. I don't want to harsh your mellow (did I seriously just type that? God, I did.) but... writing to each other in the comments? Isn't textless? And possibly punishable? I could just be hallucinating though...
john & hank - this vlog series is amazing!
I actually spit liquid all over my bedspread when I heard the virginity comment. I think we're now all entitled to hear the content of that call. Come on. Please?
PS-I've been watching from the very beginning, but this is the first time my laptop/blogger has decided to actually let my comment be accepted. hurrah!
Just a quick word to tell Hank: it's fine to not want a baby! They are cute and all, but not everyone needs one. Plus, Baby Shingy (any clues as to the origin of that name?) sort of eliminates the need for any babies, right?
Sweet dancin Moses, Maureen! At first I felt horrible for you. Then I had to wonder... what did you DO to that guy?!
Okay Hank here's my two cents: Have babies in a few years. You + Katherine = some seriously cute and talented kids. Then, I'll just get a transfer to Montana and be your nanny. I'm good at that stuff.
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